One of the questions I get asked all of the time is what you do to switch off? What do you do in your spare time? Are you always “on”?
I find this question difficult to answer in some ways because I absolutely DO have more in my life than my business BUT equally my business is a massively important part of who am I and what I do.
Let’s take this back a little bit. I am switched on quite a lot of the time. Why? Is this a need within me or is it because I’m “hustling” << NO, it’s definitely neither of those things. For me it’s about the fact that I am here to help and support and serve my Rockstars. This is more than a business, this is my mission and my passion. This is my soul essence, what I’m here to do.
- It’s not about chasing sales.
- It’s not about impressing people.
- It’s not about hustling.
- It’s not about desperate or anxious business growth.
- It’s not about half help.
- I’m all in!
BUT is that to my own detriment? Perhaps, it sometimes is. Perhaps I do train my lovely Rockstars into an expectation that they get a response very quickly from me, perhaps I do add a level of pressure to keep up those levels of service. Perhaps it means that I don’t have as much tech free time as others.
BUT, do you know what, I wouldn’t want it any other way. I wouldn’t want to think that people were struggling because I hadn’t got round to answering their message or offer a helping hand. I wouldn’t want to think that people were flapping and flailing because they just needed a little nudge.
My mission is one of service. AND I’ll do everything that I can to ensure that I am fulfilling this.
I also have to balance this with the fact that I must ensure that I don’t burn out. It’s important that I set a self boundary and ensure that my work fills me up rather than leaves me depleted.
So, here’s the thing. If you are here to serve others then you absolutely can’t do that from an empty vessel. You can’t keep giving and giving and giving your own energy without re-injecting your own energy supplies.
It’s all about keeping up the levels of help and support without compromising my own energy. One of the big ones I live by is this quote;
If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I’m about to do today? If the answer is no for too many days in a row I know I need to change something ~ Steve Jobs
If the answer is no too many days in a row OR if the majority of the things you do per day are NOs then it’s absolutely time to make some changes.
If you don’t love what you do then you must stop IMMEDIATELY. It’s hugely important that you don’t grow a beast. What you do EVERY SINGLE DAY makes you who you are. It impacts directly on your mood, it impacts on your outlook and it impacts on your experiences. Not every day will be pixies & unicorns BUT you gotta make sure that what you are doing every day is stuff you love to do.
Another quote that falls in here is;
If you do what you love, you’ll never work a day in your life ~ Marc Anthony
What I do isn’t work, it’s my mission and calling and it very rarely feels like it depletes me.
Let’s get to actually switching off! Again ~ what do you love doing? Self care ISN’T about lots of the lame stuff that you read and makes you roll your eyes. Self care is about doing stuff that fills your cup. You have to make decisions based on what you love to do. I’ve written a full article about it here >>click to read<<
Here’s my top tips;
- Don’t make “switching off” another thing on your list (that makes you feel bad and that you have the potential to fail at). If switching off feels filled with pressure then it’s not truly serving you. The one that I’ve experiences on this one is going on holiday. I have gone on holiday in the past and totally turned off all the tech. For the first couple of days I’ve felt anxious and for the last couple of days I’ve felt anxious. It’s wasted my down time. So, I’ve worked out what works for me and as I’m a morning person and get up before the rest of the family I’ve checked in on all stuff that needs attention within the first 15 minutes of the day (without it having any impact on anyone else) and then been able to get on with the joys and excitment of connecting properly with my gorgeous little family.
- Make sure you’re doing what you love (at least MOST of the time). Don’t spend every day miserable. Don’t accept a continuous experience that doesn’t feel good for you. Make conscious choices to serve yourself too.
- Find ways that downtime can fill your cup and work for you ~ which doesn’t have to be solo activities or length retreats or luxurious bubble baths if that’s not your idea of disconnection time.
- Remember that you can’t fulfil your mission without filling your own cup.
I hope that this has give you some ideas in places and eased the guilt in other places!